Disconnect
by by7the7sea
Summary: Bucky crosses paths with someone who stirs some memories and gives him some advice.


**Author's Notes:** Takes place after the end credit scene in Winter Soldier. _Italicized text_ indicates thoughts or memories.

 **xxx MCU xxx**

He leaves the museum quickly, trying to distance himself from the reality he just witnessed. Memories try to resurface, but never quite break through. It's haunting him, frustrating him.

Once outside, he doesn't have a destination. He's lost and has no way to know where to go, so he turns left. From there, he randomly walks around the Capitol until he ends up outside a nursing home. He's getting hungry and thirsty, so he slips inside.

Years of training to read places and people serves him well. It's the only skill he's had to use in the past 70 years. He easily assesses how to avoid the video surveillance then finds the dining room and pockets a sandwich and a bottle of water. He exits the building through the back.

A few of the residents are outside enjoying the sun. All are facing away from the building, so he takes this opportunity to sit down and enjoy his impromptu lunch. He finds a corner of the porch that's hidden away. He sits down and removes the baseball cap he's been wearing and runs his hand through his hair. He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. It was nice to be able to just sit and breathe.

His moment of solitude is interrupted by his stomach rumbling, so he takes out the sandwich and eats it. He finds it difficult to remember the taste of food. The sandwich tastes good ... he thinks. He doesn't seem to have a point of reference for something as simple as a sandwich. He can't remember the last time he ate and not sure if that's because he hasn't eaten in a very long time or an effect of his jumbled mind. He determines that it's a mix of both. He must have eaten something since that day he dragged that man from the water. No, not just a man, his friend.

 _"I'm not gonna fight you. You're my friend."_

 _"Because I'm with you to the end of the line."_

What was it about that phrase? He was punching him and trying to finish his mission then the man said that and he couldn't finish it, his mission.

Other flashes of memories appear and disappear quickly ... _a little guy trying to fight a guy twice as big as he is ... a red-headed girl and a carnival game ... walking that same little guy home after a funeral ... random images of war ... the feeling of falling_ then the memories stop. He closes his eyes trying to get the memories to stay and figure out what they were, but it doesn't work. He wants to scream in frustration, but is aware enough to know there are too many people around and he doesn't want to draw attention to himself.

He takes another moment to calm down and get his bearings as best he can under the circumstances then stands up and jumps down from the porch. He walks past a few residents before realizing he left his cap on the porch.

As he turns around to go back, the elderly woman sitting in a wheelchair gasps.

"You ... you look like," the woman responds, "someone I used to know ... many years ago."

He freezes and stares at her. There is something about her voice that seems vaguely familiar to him, but he's not sure why. It compels him to stay instead of running away.

"I ... I do?"

"Yes, your face, those eyes. The hair isn't right, though."

He self-consciously runs his hand through his hair again.

"What was his name?"

She struggles to come up with it.

"He was a friend of Steve's. They were very close. What was his name!" Her failing memory causing her temper to flare from frustration.

He realizes Steve is the name of the little guy in those memories.

"Steve?"

"Yes, Steve. Did you know him?"

"I ... I don't know."

"You don't know?"

"No, I don't," he replies sadly. "I don't remember much about anything."

"Join the club, I know why I don't, but how could you be that way too? You're too young to have that problem."

"I ... I've been through a lot." He wanted to say he'd been tortured, but he wasn't sure that was right. Plus, he didn't want to scare this nice lady. "I only remember the last few days. The rest is ... gone."

"Oh, my. I'm sorry to hear that," she responds then places a hand on his gloved fingers. He pulls his hand away instantly. She doesn't seem to notice the abrupt action.

"Well, it's not completely gone. There are flashes of memories, but then they disappear again. I can't seem to hold onto them. It's all scrambled up here," he says as he points to his head.

She looks at him with deep concern.

"Sounds like you've been through a lot."

He nods his head.

"Try writing it down ... what you remember. It might help."

"I will. Thank you." He latches onto that idea. He hopes he would remember it.

One of the nurses approaches them.

"Ms. Carter, your gentleman caller is here."

"You sure remind me of Steve's friend," she tells him, seemingly not hearing the nurse. "Wish I could remember his name ... Ja ... James? I think that was it. Doesn't sound right. Hmmm ..."

His eyes widened at the name. That was the name on that display in the museum. Was she really someone who knew him?

"Peg! You have a visitor," the nurse says again as she reaches the pair. He backs away quickly before the nurse gets a good look at him.

"Oh, good," she says to the nurse. "Let me finish my visit with ..."

As she turns to address him, he's gone.

"Where did he go?"

 **xxx MCU xxx**

 _"Peg."_ He gets a flash of a memory of _a young woman in red walking into a bar_.

"Steve's Peg?" He thinks as he walks down the street. What did that even mean? It sounds right, but he couldn't put it together with the mess that is his mind.

"Try writing it down."

Yes, he will do that.

 **xxx THE END xxx**

 **Author's Note:** My use of only he or him in reference to Bucky is deliberate. He doesn't know who he is yet. Also, can you guess who Peg's "gentleman caller" is? I bet you can.


End file.
